I have had a lot of time lately to ponder various ideas. It's funny how keeping your hands busy doing easy things allows your mind time to more freely think and ponder ideas.
Anyways, recently I had this thought that I can't shake. I've been pondering relationships, friendships, and the human need for them, as well as the need and desire to feel fulfilled by all of the various relationships in our lives.
It occurred to me that it is likely impossible to feel 100% fulfilled by any amount or quantity of relationships nor is it possible to feel 100% fulfilled within any relationship. No matter how deep the relationship or the type of relationship there will always be parts of you that the other person will not appreciate or accept. Yes, they may treat you with love and kindness, but they may also ask you to stop doing certain things.
For example, I love my kids to the moon and back, but I don't love it when they whine, or throw tantrums, or just scream to get heard. There are things that I can do to cope with those things and make living together easier, but likely I will never come to enjoy the whining or tantrums.
Fast forward to me washing the dishes and pondering this while the kids are watching Moana....
Well, it turns out that the coconut has hundreds of uses. Seriously, I never realized it but the coconut has many different parts and facets that have many different uses. Just like people.
Just like the coconut, there will be parts of you that others might not fully appreciate. I love coconut milk and dried coconut but can't gag down coconut water. That doesn't mean that coconut water is bad, I know that there are many people that love it, but it's just not for me. That doesn't mean that I ignore the whole coconut or that coconuts are bad. That just means that coconut water is just not for me.
The same thing goes for people. We all want others to love and accept every single part of us, but there might just be some parts that others don't care for or appreciate. That doesn't make that part of you necessarily bad though, or mean that all of us is bad or rejected. Instead we have to work to the understanding that no one person is going to love every single part of us, and find freedom on the other side of that.
On the other side of realizing that people are not capable of loving every single part of us IS freedom. Once we are able to realize that not everyone will love every detail about us is the ability to realize that we are wonderful, no matter which parts others love or appreciate. In the end it's not about what or how much of us others accept, it's about learning to accept ourselves. That is what matters.
